Remember Me Read online

  A few moments later and the door handle moved downwards. Grabbing her phone in one hand, and the lamp in her other, Ava kicked the table out of the way. She stood well to one side and booted the door.

  The door slammed open with a bang, and she flung herself at her assailant. But her hands met air and darkness, and her feet met a warm solid body. Clicking the light switch in the hallway she saw a perturbed tabby cat looking up at her. It didn’t seem offended she had nearly stamped on its head, and walked purposefully into her room.

  ‘Ava? Is everything okay?’ It was Alex, the private investigator, fumbling into a brown velour dressing gown, clutching a spray deodorant in one hand.

  ‘I… yes, thank you. Bloody cat was scratching at my door, and I thought…’ She regained her breath, thankful that she was still wearing jogging bottoms and a white fleece, rather than more conventional nightwear.

  ‘Oh. Well, that’s all right then. As long as you are all right.’ Alex’s thin body was enveloped in the flapping dressing gown and blue pyjama bottoms that almost covered his long pale feet. He was looking at the floor now, a flush of pink touching his cheeks.

  Reluctantly, Ava pushed her door wider. ‘Thanks for coming to the rescue. The Birtleys probably wouldn’t notice if I was murdered on the premises. Look, I’ve got some whisky in my room – there’s not much left, but would you like a glass?’

  He smiled thinly, and she thought he would refuse, but, ‘That would be most welcome. Thank you.’

  It was a bit awkward, being in such close proximity, but she poured them both a drink (a small one as her supplies dwindled to nothing), and perched on the bed, whilst he sat in the overstuffed pink armchair.

  ‘So how did your interviews go?’

  ‘At Cadrington, or in general?’

  She shrugged. ‘Either. All of them. You said you only planned to stay a couple of days, so I’m thinking you probably have it all wrapped up by now.’

  His lips twisted into a glimmer of a smile, and the lines around his grey eyes wrinkled briefly. ‘You realise I can’t tell you anything, of course, Detective Cole.’

  Ava answered the smile with a genuine one of her own. ‘I know. I suppose I settled on my theory years ago. There is always something about a cold case, though, especially one you are personally involved in. I still expect to get a phone call or email or something from Ellen, even though I have accepted it can’t happen.’

  ‘I’m sorry. Ava, can I ask why you were so worried about the cat in the hallway? Were you expecting someone, or were you worried by anything?’

  She glared at him. ‘I didn’t know it was a bloody cat, or clearly I wouldn’t have reacted like that. And no, I wasn’t expecting anyone. It was a turn of phrase.’

  ‘As you say…’ He downed the last of his whisky, and rose from the chair. ‘I’m staying until Wednesday, just a few things to summarise for my report, so I hope I’ll see you again before I leave. As I said, I can’t tell you too much, but, well, there aren’t any surprises in my notes. I truly believe that the Smiths will be able to leave Aberdyth with the information I do have, but it isn’t by any means conclusive.’

  She understood what he was trying to say. ‘Of course. I think they will be happy with any closure they can get, and if they feel it comes from an official source, it will be enough for them. The filming starts on Tough Love tomorrow, so I’ll go down and a have a look.’

  ‘Your son is going to be one of the contestants, I believe?’

  ‘No secrets in this village, are there? Yes, he and his girlfriend have been invited along.’

  ‘Ava, before I say goodnight, can I just ask you something?’

  ‘Of course.’

  ‘How well did you know Alf Thomas?’

  She had to think for moment, then spoke with genuine puzzlement. ‘Penny’s uncle? He was a really nice bloke. He used to coach the football team. Ellen and I were the only girls in the team and he let us play in matches.’

  His expression said that he already knew this. ‘And he now lives in Kingsmead Residential Home?’

  ‘Yes. It’s that big old place behind the bungalows, at the bottom of the hill. I believe the land used for the new development used to be the garden. You can see it from the pub. I haven’t spoken directly to Penny about it, because there hasn’t been time, but I think he was diagnosed with MS quite a few years back. He lived with them at the farm for a while, until his condition advanced, and he needed round-the-clock care. Why are you interested?’

  Alex shook his head. ‘Background, that’s all. Now two other names for you; Andrew Menzies, and Sara Blackmore. Ring any bells?’

  Ava frowned. ‘Mr Menzies was the old headmaster at our primary school. Nice old man, but strict as hell. The boys adored him because he let them play rugby every afternoon. He was very traditional, keen on clean hands at lunchtime, and shiny shoes, that kind of thing. Sorry, Sara Blackmore I can’t recall.’

  ‘No matter. I’m just trying to build up an accurate picture of Ellen’s childhood, the key figures, the places she went, that kind of thing. Miss Blackmore is a librarian who worked on the mobile library that used to visit Aberdyth.’

  She nodded. ‘I do remember her now. She had short black hair and she never smiled. Oh shit, and she was the one who kept writing to the local papers about the bad behaviour of teenagers in the villages. Ellen and I loved reading, but she almost seemed to actively discourage us from borrowing anything. What connection does she have to Ellen’s disappearance though?’

  ‘None, as far as I’m aware. I’m just checking off names, building that picture. Thank you, that is very helpful. Now are you sure there isn’t anything else I can help with, Ava? Look, your intruder seems to have made himself at home.’ He pointed to where the cat was curled at the foot of her bed, purring loudly.

  She hesitated for a second, wondering whether to confide, but shrinking from showing him the photographs, of leading a trail to Ellen’s grave before she was ready. She smiled at him. ‘No, I’m fine thank you.’ She was pretty sure he knew she was lying.

  Chapter 13

  Big Water was shimmering in the early morning sun, glittering rays bouncing off the water, dancing back up the hills and across the distant icy rooftops of Aberdyth. Ava had decided to run down, as nobody had offered her a lift and she didn’t feel like asking. It was only about five miles, and it helped lift her mood slightly.

  There were fewer people than Ava had expected. The film crew were drinking from flasks of coffee, two trailers boasted catering and toilets, and a mobile office Portakabin sat underneath a winter-blasted oak tree.

  ‘Ava, over here!’ Penny said, waving excitedly. In her red scarf and woollen hat, with her blonde hair just peeking out around her face, she could have been twelve again. Only the lines around her eyes, and a slight hardness in her pointed face spoke of life experience that was the unwanted gift of ageing. ‘Are you feeling better today?’

  ‘Yes, I’m fine. Sorry about yesterday. As you say, just a combination of hangover and jetlag. I slept most of yesterday.’ Ava scowled as Leo approached. As soon as she got him alone, she was going to interrogate him, the smug bastard. The photographs burned in her brain, and she was still jumping at every shadow after a crap night of staring at the bedroom door.

  Penny gave her a quick hug. ‘I’m so glad. I was worried about you!’

  ‘She worries about everyone. I think she even tried to pack Stephen’s case for him yesterday.’ Paul had emerged from one of the trailers and slid a possessive arm around his wife’s shoulders.

  ‘I didn’t!’ Penny smacked him on the arm, but she was laughing.

  ‘He didn’t need it anyway. Look, they have to wear those coloured shirts and headbands. Stephen and Bethan are near the back.’ Paul pointed to the nervous group of contestants. He was moving slowly today, as though in pain. His manner seemed to have softened slightly towards her, but Ava knew he would never take her into his confidence. That was okay too – she had hurt him and abandone
d him. She had never expected anything more than a type of armed neutrality from their relationship.

  Today, she had other things on her mind.

  Leo waved at them, and ran over briefly. ‘We’re all set, so if you want to grab a drink from catering, you can watch them come down the zip line. We’ve got a couple of drones set up overhead, and of course cameras on the raft in the water, so you can watch on the monitors when they get out of sight.’ Without waiting for an answer, he winked at them and ran back to his crew.

  Ava, Paul and Penny drifted towards the coffee, and were soon clutching plastic cups. The coffee was about as good as it was back in the precinct at home, Ava thought wryly, sipping black goo, and reaching for the pink packets of sugar.

  Penny slipped an arm through hers, beaming up at her. ‘Isn’t this great? Stephen is going to be part of Tough Love! I can’t wait to watch him on TV when the show airs.’

  Ava nodded; her tongue seemed to be glued to the roof of her mouth. She gave up on the sugar and chucked the coffee onto the icy ground. If she was completely honest, she didn’t want Stephen competing in a reality show. She wanted to talk to him, get to know him, try to explain a bit more maybe. The money she had saved for him was stashed away in a separate account – it could wait until she figured out how to give it to him.

  A man with a loud hailer instructed the contestants to start walking up the hill. There were fourteen of them. As always, they had been carefully chosen to appeal to different viewers, so there was a mix of body shapes, ethnic backgrounds, and fiery personalities. Ava lived in LA, she had dated actors, hell, she lived with one, and she knew that bland personalities were not welcome in reality shows.

  There was some good-natured competition in the run up the hill, with a couple of the muscular boys already drawing ahead, seemingly forgetting their girlfriends. That would not look good when the public came to vote in the final. Leo was busy giving some spiel in front of the camera, in his blue Tough Love polo shirt. His confident, cheeky persona, the messed-up black hair and dark-blue eyes had gotten him a worldwide fan base. Ava told herself she found it sickening. A few specially selected journalists were chatting with the crew, and there were photographers dotted along the trail up the hillside. In this initial scrum for the lead, every tiny blunder, every cross word or expression would be recorded. Later, the cameras would be fewer and further between challenges, giving more chance for the contestants to relax.

  One girl was already having a tantrum because her lover had left her behind. After every sob, and every flick of her long blonde hair, she peeked up to find out if the cameras were still on her. Her shirt was straining to contain her large breasts, and her fake tan had turned her an unnatural deep mahogany colour.

  Ava snorted in amusement and disdain, but her eyes flicked between Leo and her son. Stephen and Bethan were in the middle of the pack, running easily side-by-side. They would have a massive advantage, being brought up in these hills. Although everyone knew Tough Love wasn’t just about physical fitness, it was a huge part of the game.

  As the first runners disappeared over the crest of the hill and into the flash of winter sunlight, Leo finished his chat and walked back over. He was crackling with energy, enthusiasm, and could have matched Penny with excitement. This was part of his appeal, Ava supposed. He was never bored, always got into the heart of the game… and the hearts of his viewers. It had made him a millionaire several times over, according to the press.

  ‘If you watch up by that red flag on the next hill… That’s where they get on the zip line. Long way down, isn’t it?’ Leo smiled at Ava. ‘Are you feeling all right today? Sorry, I saw you tried to call but I was up to my ears with all the paperwork. Was it something important?’

  A block of ice, that had nothing to do with the coldness of the day, lodged itself deep in her stomach. ‘No, it wasn’t that important, but I do need to talk to you later, Leo. If you’ve got time of course,’ she added, trying to keep the anger out of her voice.

  ‘Sure. Give me about an hour to get everyone swimming in the lake, and then I will have recorded all my bits for today. We can have lunch by the lake. It’s a bit cold but there’ll be some soup from the catering van.’ He was unconcerned, big blue eyes wide and guileless. He moved closer. ‘You look gorgeous in fitness gear; you always did have a sexy bum.’

  Before Ava could retaliate, Penny stepped forward. ‘Leave Ava alone, Leo. Lunch sounds lovely, though.’ She beamed at them both, but her husband frowned at her. ‘Oh, sorry, I mean it would be, but we need to go to a doctor’s appointment at two. Paul, don’t you think we might be able to just stop for lunch?’

  Paul was staring at the hilltop, his eyes narrowed in the white light, face drawn and old. There was a row of beaded sweat on his forehead. ‘No. Sorry, but we need to get back…’ His voice was distant, almost faltering over the words.

  Penny looked over, her face changing, eyes brightening, ‘Of course, love.’ She kissed his cheek, taking his arm in hers.

  ‘See you later! Stephen’s up there now. I just need to pop over to the office,’ Leo said, resting his hand briefly on his friend’s shoulder. He ran off, shouting instructions to a couple of crew members. They gave him the thumbs-up and resumed their tinkering with a couple of huge cameras.

  Penny pointed at a large group of people in a cordoned-off area near the gate. ‘See the boy near the front, with blonde hair and the red top? That’s Kai, Jesse’s son, oh and the boys to his right are Emlyn and Joshua. They’re village boys too, but I don’t know their parents well – they come from the estate down the hill.’

  Ava studied the tall, slim Kai in his red Nike hoodie. He was leaning against the gate, looking at his mobile phone. Even allowing for the distance between them, he looked nothing like his dad. How much of his past had Jesse shared with his son? The unwelcome thought made her shiver. Did Kai know anything about Ellen’s death, or her own disappearance? But if he did know, he clearly hadn’t shared the truth with Stephen or Bethan. Their questions that first night at the farm had been focused on her failures as a mother. Bethan had mentioned Ellen in passing, she recalled, but without any avid curiosity.

  ‘Bloody stupid, this whole idea,’ Paul said suddenly, breathing heavily. The familiar stubborn expression had returned to his square face, and he scowled at Ava as though it was her fault. Everything, from the broken washing machine to the fact Stephen was born by emergency C-section, instead of naturally, had always been her fault.

  ‘It’s made Leo a lot of money,’ Penny said mildly.

  Ava got the impression it wasn’t the first time they had argued about this. Herself? She supposed she admired her son for jumping in feet first. He had made no effort to contact her before the show, although Penny assured Ava that he now had her mobile number. She had hesitated to call him, but now wished she had just bloody done it. A reality show would never be her bag, but it was a tried and tested way of launching a career, so she should probably support him. ‘Does Bethan really want to be a model?’

  ‘Oh, she does! She was the one who suggested going on the show, but I don’t think Stephen minds. Bethan fancies some of that cash prize, I suppose, as well as being famous for five minutes. Apparently she wants to study media or something at university, and then go into television presenting,’ Penny said.

  ‘Really? She seemed so quiet… not really the type.’ Ava was surprised.

  ‘She’s Huw’s daughter all right. A madam when she feels like it. But then Stephen’s got an attitude on him sometimes. Just like his dad.’ Penny softened the words with a wink and smile, and her husband grudgingly smiled back.

  ‘What does Stephen want to do for a career?’ Ava asked quickly. He seemed so far removed from her life, and now instead of getting to know him, she was watching him head off into the hills. She wondered how much her coming home had influenced his decision to do the show, or if it was his way of distracting himself from his dad’s diagnosis. The horror of losing Paul, the man who had brought him
up, must be fresh in his mind, especially as Paul’s illness progressed.

  ‘He’s not sure. He’s very lazy at school, but last I heard he was talking about photography and media studies. That might have been just to please Bethan though. She wants to go to Cardiff to study. I’m not sure if he really has his heart set on travelling with Kai, and Bethan certainly doesn’t want him to go away,’ Penny told her.

  Watching the film crew working efficiently together, shouting directions, laughing and swapping jokes, made Ava long for her own team. People she could trust, and talk to with no ulterior motive, no exhausting history to be constantly bypassed. Another plastic cup of coffee, and a rubbery croissant, whiled away the time. She studied the hills, the dots that were the contestants, the drones circling overhead, and the long zip line that led onto a distant platform in the middle of Big Water.

  Paul, who was standing next to Ava, suddenly turned and looked hard at her. ‘You all right, Ava? You look… a bit pale? I was saying to Penny you look like you haven’t slept well.’ He smiled with his mouth, but his eyes remained cold. Was there a trace of amusement in the unexpectedly solicitous words?

  Ava shivered. ‘Fine thanks. I need to get back and have a shower soon. I probably stink after that run, and my hands are frozen.’ It was hard to get a handle on Paul at the moment, and any judgement or suspicion was clouded by the fact that this was someone living out a death sentence. And the clock was ticking.

  He nodded slowly and turned back to the hill, where Stephen could now be seen jostling with his fellow contestants.

  Ava studied his averted profile for a moment, and then smiled at Penny, who was watching them both anxiously, clearly worried Paul would say the wrong thing. If Leo took the pictures, maybe Paul knew about them? Hell, maybe the whole group were in on it, turning against her – always the outsider coming back to stir up trouble. She could dismiss her fears as paranoia, but she was still on the other side of the fence, and their laughter, their little glances, spoke a different language.